Two Kids, One Car, Zero Regrets
We survived - dare I say thrived? - an 8 hour road trip
After months (years, really) of build up to our first trip as a family of four, I did not expect my hottest of takes to emerge.
I liked traveling with two kids even more than I have liked traveling with one.
To be fair, we have 3x cross-country flights and 2x international flights with both kids upcoming, so I reserve the right to report back. Today, this is my stance.
With one kid, I was constantly trying to avoid something going wrong.
With two kids, something will, with absolute certainty, go wrong.
As a result, and out of sheer necessity, I had the unexpected privilege of experiencing myself as a more carefree traveling parent. Not entirely carefree (have we met?!), but the chaos of two kids has, somewhat surprisingly, had a grounding effect on my state of mind.
Read on for how we constructed our first family road trip, the most valuable products for keeping a toddler entertained on the road, why two kids were easier than one, and what I’d do differently next time.
THE TRIP
Where: Scottsdale, Arizona
Why: To make a long weekend out of Joe’s business trip while I am on mat leave
When: Four nights in April 2025
How: Road trip. 6 hour drive time, 8 hours total each way (including stops)
THE KIDS
Toddler (2 years, 11 months): Daytime potty trained, eats solids, no naps
Newborn (10 weeks): Diapers, nursing, 5-6 naps per day
See the ROAD TRIP PACKING LIST for everything we traveled with.
Splitting the Mental Load of Planning
In 2021, Joe and I did a cross-country road trip. We had peak post-2020 energy, the world had just started to open back up and we were a few months away from the jolting shift in mindset that comes upon learning you are expecting a baby.
Driving across the country was the experience of a lifetime… and I never need to do it again.
I am no big fan of long drives and prefer the efficiency of flying. Plus, I love an airport.
But for our first trip as a family of four, a road trip made sense. Lower stakes, flexible pace, and the bonus of having our own car in Scottsdale. All were welcome when staring down the logistics of traveling with two small kids for the first time.
Our trip came together in the haze of newborn life thanks to a true team effort.
Joe pitched the idea of tacking a long weekend onto his work trip. He mapped out the drive, flagged potential stops, and rounded up toddler-friendly activities in Scottsdale.
I compared lodging options (Airbnb won, as usual—for space, location, and kid-friendly amenities), made the packing list, did most of the packing, and sketched out a loose itinerary at our destination.
The 4am Math of Road Tripping with a Newborn
Solving for departure time was a game of if/then.
The dream: leave early enough to beat traffic and catch the girls sleeping for the first leg. The reality: cue wishful thinking.
Since the newborn is still unpredictable overnight, we agreed to leave after her first feeding - as long as it wasn’t before 4:00 am - hoping we could squeeze in a bit more sleep before the drive.
The newborn has impeccable timing and woke up at 3:44 am.
I fed her, we attempted to go back to sleep, and failed. The early morning hours were spent finishing packing up the car, feeding the baby again and by 6:30 am when roused our older daughter to put her in the car, she was fully awake for the day!
Our toddler has entirely dropped her nap before 3 years old, which I love for weekend activity flexibility… but a car nap would have made our rating of the drive go from a 9.5 to a full-on 10/10.
By 7:00 am, the Kleins were on the road.
Planning Pit Stops
It is doubtful you need the details of the exact McDonald’s or the lousy desert pizza spot that we ended up making our stops. What mattered most was having a plan.
We aimed for a stop every ~two hours, following the “two-hour rule”: both to keep the newborn from being in the car seat too long (slumping = breathing risk) and to align with her feedings. This also built in regular potty breaks for the toddler, avoiding accidents on the road and allowing her some movement as she would get antsy after 90-100 minutes in the car.
Having a shortlist of potential stops mapped out in advance was hugely beneficial when facing the juggle of driving, entertaining kids and operating on little sleep.
The Full-Time Job of the Front Seat
One might (incorrectly) assume that physically driving is the more difficult task on a trip like this. But add two children and several hours into the equation - the parent passenger has their work cut out for them.
The parent in the passenger seat is responsible for strategic snack and toy deployment. Just enough to keep the toddler entertained, but not so much that everything loses its novelty too quickly. This role involves a lot of turning around, stretching to reach dropped items and fielding endless toddler requests.
In our case, both the drive to Scottsdale and the one back home ended with a parent in the back seat. Joe and I alternated driving to give each other a breather from passenger parenting.
💡 Tip: Take the time to organize the items in the car such that the necessary ones (snacks, water, toys, wipes, tissues) are easily reachable for the parent in the front passenger seat.
Two Kids Are Easier Than One?
All this being said, this road trip felt significantly easier than the one we took a year ago, despite now having two kids in the car instead of one.
The biggest difference: our toddler is almost three. This matters because:
I was comfortable giving her snacks in the car. This wasn’t the case a year ago. Using the snack spinner (below) we had solid stretches where she was satisfied independently eating her snacks.
She was more engaged with the toys we brought. A year ago, she required a more frequent rotation of toys to keep her attention, which was exhausting as the non-driving parent.
I always emphasize the age of kids as a huge factor when traveling. This trip reinforced that point. It also added another layer: the age gap between kids is relevant, too.
Compared to the challenges of traveling with a 1-2.5 year old (early mobility, lack of communication ability, choking hazards), the newborn and almost-3 year old combo was a dream.
Newborn in the car:
94% asleep
4% crying
2% awake and content
Toddler in the car:
55% toys & books
25% snacks
15% chatting and singing
5% complaining
0% asleep
As you can see, only about 9% of the 6-hour drive time (32 minutes) was spent in the negative territory of crying or complaining. I call that win.
One thing I did not expect: needing to stop every two hours for the newborn was actually a positive. Last year when we drove the four hours up to Santa Ynez, our goal was to drive as long as possible without stopping. This made the journey more grueling as we tried to eek out incremental minutes to get us closer to our destination. This time, with planned stops, no single stretch of driving felt too long - there was always an endpoint in sight.
MVPs of Toddler Road Trip Entertainment
Snack Spinner. Critical to the success of our road trip. The many compartments, paired with the spinning mechanism, turned snack time into entertainment and continuously bought us time. We re-filled it with a variety of little snacks over the course of the drive. Yes, it is worth every penny of the $30 cost.
Yoto Mini. Excellent for our long, screen-free trip. Each Yoto card plays a series of songs & stories, and a toddler can learn how to control the machine themselves. The app provides parental controls for sound and the noise did not disturb the newborn. Just remember to download the cards before leaving WiFi.
Sticker/Coloring Book. A big ol’ book of animal habitat stickers & coloring pages. Need I say more.
Visual Timer. A highly utilized item at home that came in clutch as we neared the end of each driving window to combat the “are we there yet” whining that comes along with toddler boredom and being strapped into one position for hours.
These items were equally as useful during the trip - in restaurants, at the Airbnb and during breaks at museums.
For the record, we did consider a backseat caddy / car seat tray for the toddler. However, these aftermarket products are not recommended as they can become large projectiles in an accident. We ultimately decided against for safety reasons.
What I’d Do Differently Next Time
I would plan toddler-friendly activities as a part of our pit stops.
For our first big road trip, we were singularly focused on identifying the proper stops based on drive time. So much so that we did not heavily consider what we’d be doing in those stops. This is how we ended up at two McDonald’s, a Starbucks, and that underwhelming pizza place in the exceedingly random desert town of Quartzsite - whose claim to fame, we learned, is the camels brought there from Egypt and Turkey during the 19th century.
With the confidence of a successful road trip under our belt, I would go a bit out of our way to do some toddler-friendly stops next time, like the Cabazon Dinosaurs, thus making the long driving days feel more integrated into the travel experience.
Even so, this trip made the case for road travel with kids. Just ask me again once the baby is on the move.
Thank you for reading! If you know a parent who loves travel (or wants to), would you be kind enough to send Carry On their way?
x Amanda
p.s. you can always see all posts on the website